We had a union meeting of the library section. There were only 12 of us but many questions were asked and discussed. The hottest topic was the recent canceling of hours leaving enumerable substitutes without work.

This is something that has affected me as well, although I have a part-time permanent position. But the truth is that basic salary is not enough to support me. I really am questioning myself why I have stuck it out so long.

One of the subjects was the use of volunteers in the libraries and how slowly but surely they appear to be taking over our jobs. The point was made that regular staff are so overworked, with stafffing stretched so thin, that they welcome volunteers doing the work. It seems that they are more valued than we are.

The union reps said they could not grieve or complain for us if we did not tell them what was going on.

One very upsetting report was that the sub hours were cut because subs would not go where the most necessary jobs were, that the cuts were not finiancial but merely vindictive. Subs also reported that they were being chastised for not working more days and going futher than perhaps they wanted to. One person described how she had worked 17 days in a row and was talked into working one more.

This is a new thing. When I started this nonsense did not go on and it is shocking how messed up the thinking is. For instance, there are 12 unfilled Library Assistant positions in the county and who knows how many clerks and librarian jobs. Some libraries have not had a Children's Librarian for two years.

Obviously, if those positions were filled the substitute situation would be mostly solved. Some of the subs would be hired as permanent employees and the number of hours needing coverage would lesson

Of course, this doesn't solve the problem of why subs won't go to certain libraries and it is stupid of administration not to wonder. They seem, to me, to be living in a la-la land. It is too damn bad.

Who Needs to Make a Living?

There is a sense as a library worker that you're involved in a job that is out of the ordinary because it is a job with a higher purpose. Free public libraries are a cornerstone of American democracy. They are a living symbol of the best qualities of civilization.

Yeah, ok. Meanwhile, do I need to go on food stamps?

Don't get me wrong. I love libraries. Have all my life. At times, they have been a refuge and a safety zone. Somewhere I could go that was free, comfortable and safe.

For instance, I moved to New York City when I was first married. It wasn't exactly my idea but i couldn't come up with a better one. The city scared me and I could hardly step outside. My husband went off to his new waiter job and I remember laying in bed thinking there had to some way to get myself up and out.

A vision of the lions outside the New York Public Library building came into my mind. The Library! There had to branches. I looked it up in the phone book, which got me out of bed, and there was, less than a block away, and that got me out of the apartment.

But now, having worked for a library system for all these years, and having struggled financially every step of the way, I kind of resent the attitude that the institution is more important than the people who are part of it.

But maybe it is. On the one hand it's only library work, not the cure for any kind of cancer. On the other hand, maybe the researcher who does, got her love of knowledge from early storytimes

I probably shouldn't have got myself caught up in the whole library mystique. It is very good to be proud of the job, for all the silly stereotypes about libraries and the people who work in them. I am also proud of myself for doing a good job and of the branch where I work. But I would be even prouder if I could get my teeth and car fixed -- I need 2 implants, new air-conditioning, working windows and an oil change. The last thing I'm planning on doing at the next pay period, trusting that the yellow light won't change to red until then!

Life in Libraryland is not without Anxiety

When I first started working as a Library Assistant, my eldest niece commented that the work "must be so peaceful."

This has made me laugh because, of course, any job where you deal with the public is not peaceful - at all! But nowadays, working in Libraryland is kind of miserable what with cuts, layoffs and libraries closing.

I have been an LA for nearly 10 years but although I'm a "permanent employee" in a large county library, I am a 20 hour part-timer. Technically I'm 20/40 which means I can work 20 extra hours at one of the 25 libraries in the system. This in addition to my regular schedule at my home library.

The good points: I have a home library, can do some interesting work from time to time, get excellent health benefits, get paid sick leave and vacation and very soon will be eligible for retirement. My 10 years is 5 in county time, if you know what I mean.

Meanwhile, nobody can live in the Bay Area on 20 hours so the extra hours makes it possible to pay rent, buy food, put gas in the car and in the past even go on vacations, buy Christmas presents, and shop consignment stores.

The downside? Can't pay for big dental or automobile bills. And I'm always worried about money. In fact, it seems to me that I spend a good deal of time raising money. I sell stuff on ebay, take things down to pawn, borrow from a payday loan place.

For a long time, it was worth scrounging because this is the first job I've ever had that I really, really liked. In fact, I would say at times I loved it.

Or they did but for the past year, in order to save staff being laid off, my system has been cutting those extra hours. I was relieved when I saw my tax return that I wasn't imagining that I had less cash; I did. But now, in the middle of 2010, things are getting brutal.

In fact, this evening our automated substitute program phoned me to cancel two jobs in July. This leaves me with one 5 hour job and, guess what, that won't do it.

It's scary at my age facing this situation. Part of the situation is that I can't quit because I need the health care, but the paycheck won't support me.